The Impossible Challenge
by Flamingo917
Summary: Written for the bra challenge. Neville is challenged by Fred and George to get a woman's item of Umbridge's and Neville is mad enough to except.


_**Written for **_The Bra Challenge**_! WOOT! Finished this! Amazing! Well, I don't know how great this is but… here it is. Thanks to my editors, as always!_**

_**Disclaimer: Oh, darn it. I'm broke. Guess that means I'm not J.K. Rowling. I'm also still a teen, something I hope she isn't.**_

_The quotes __I had to use:_

_2. Character One: "Should I touch it?" Character Two: "No! It looks dangerous."_

_5. "Pizza? What on earth has this got to do with pizza?"_

_10. Character One: "Did you find anything suspicious?" Character Two: "No comment."_

_

* * *

_

**_The Impossible Challenge_**

"Wake up Neville!"

"Yeah, do you want to miss breakfast?"

"You're a growing boy after all,"

"And we wouldn't want you to miss it,"

The last line was said in unison. That was all I could process as I slowly sat up in my bed. I rubbed my eyes sleepily, only to jump out of my skin when I saw flames before my eyes. Wait, no, those weren't flames… They were the Weasley twins, Fred and George. Just as bad as flames, really. If something, worse.

"What are you two doing here?" I asked, looking from one to the other. They were both sitting on the edge of my bed in my fifth year dormitory. My bed curtains had been drawn around us and the door was tightly closed, as if they didn't want to be over heard. Oh, god, help me!

"Why, Neville," Fred began. They both had that evil grin on their faces, like Snape had been murdered. If only… "Don't you like us?"

"Uh, yeah, of course," I muttered, shifting uncomfortably. I hadn't wanted them to get upset. When they were upset, bad things happened. No, scratch that. When they were happy, bad things happened. Okay, the only time they didn't cause bad things to happen was when they were completely and utterly depressed, like when Ginny had been prisoner of the Chamber of Secrets a few years ago. If I hadn't been sad for them, I would have been celebrating the peace.

"Aw, Neville, stop," George waved airily at me. "We're blushing,"

They weren't.

"Now, Neville," Fred said, looking at me. "We have a little… job for you,"

"More like a challenge, really," George corrected.

"And if you succeed," Fred said earnestly.

"We will not pull a prank on you,"

"For a whole month,"

"Of you're fifth year," They finished together in that twin way of theirs.

I stared at them, not knowing what to say. I didn't believe them. "A whole MONTH?"

"Yes, a month!" Fred laughed. "Haven't you been listening?"

"Hold on," I said, unsure. "What do I have to do?"

They smirked. "Oh, it's simple, really," Fred assured me. "All you have to do it get a hold of a womanly item of Professor Umbridge's,"

I stared blankly at them. "You've gone mad!"

"Really?" George looked to his brother. "I thought we were quite happy today. Oh well," He shrugged. "Now, you have one week to get it. You may have up to two accomplices- one girl, one boy, unless you use Ginny; she's been around us long enough to be an exception. And you cannot ask Professor Umbridge straight out, because frankly, that would just seem mad to her, now wouldn't it?"

"Wait," I said, slowly. "Why her?"

"Why, Neville!" George cried out. "Don't you want to help get rid of our dear Defense Against the Dark Arts professor? This is just another step to have her chucked out the doors!"

"Now," Fred held out his right hand to me. "Do you accept?"

I shifted again. Everyone knew I wasn't the smartest and most courageous bloke. There was no way I could pull this off!

"Ah, come on, Neville!" Fred whined. "Are you in Gryffindor or not?"

"Yeah, come on, Neville," George backed his brother up. "Have some guts in that body of yours,"

I didn't know how I could pull this off, and I could feel peer pressure swarm around me, but… I took his hand and shook.

"Brilliant," Fred said as he got up from my bed. "Well, Neville, pleasure doing business, but we've got to go."

"Places to go, people to prank," George said, following suit. "You know. The daily route,"

And with that the Weasley twins left me with a seemingly impossible challenge. What would my Gran say?

* * *

I banged my head against the Gryffindor table in the Great Hall as I ate breakfast the next morning. It was a Sunday, and I guessed I should get to work on the challenge. It was a good thing I did a lot of my homework yesterday at least. How. Could. I. Be. So. Stupid? There was no way I could pull this off. I couldn't ask my Gran for help; she would just tell me to be more like my dad. I guessed all I could do now was get a couple of accomplices like Fred and George said I was allowed to get.

I looked up and down the Gryffindor table to see if anyone looked like they would help me. There was Harry, Ron, and Hermione, one of the only three people I could say where my friends or at least were relatively nice to me. I didn't know them all that well. They would be glad to help me and get back at professor Umbridge, but Fred and George had only allowed me two accomplices and I wouldn't want to break the three of them up; they worked better together. There was Dean and Seamus, I supposed, but they also worked together, too, and I needed a boy and a girl-

Wait! Didn't they say if I worked with Ginny, the second partner in this crime could be boy or girl? Yeah, Ginny would help me out. I would ask her. And then she could help me choose the next person!

I quickly got up from the bench and exited the Hall. I avoided making eye contact with anyone, especially the Slytherins, and walked to the Common Room to look for her. I got lucky– Mad, right? How could I get lucky? – Since I met Ginny on the marble stairs as she went down to breakfast with a few friends from her own year.

"Hey, err… Ginny?" I asked, almost inaudible. "Could I ask you something?"

"Yeah, sure," She walked over to where I was standing on the side and waved her friends to go on without her. "What's up, Neville?"

"Well, I sort of need your help," I shifted from one foot to the next, afraid of rejection. From, you know, not getting her help on this.

"With what, exactly?" Ginny asked, her eyebrows raising.

"Well, you see, Fred and George gave me a challenge, and I wanted to know if you could help me. They said I could have two accomplices,"

"What's the challenge though?"

"To get a woman's personal item of Professor Umbridge's," I whispered quietly, just incase Peeves was invisible or under a lampshade or whatever his new hiding spot was.

Ginny burst into laughter scaring a couple of second-years going up the steps. "Are you kidding me? They dared you to do that? Of all things?"

I nodded sadly.

She sighed and looked at me almost pitifully. "What will they do if you succeed?"

I looked at my feet. "They said they wouldn't prank me for a month,"

She grinned. "Well, that's definitely something to want. Especially you– you're a big target,"

I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding. "So, you'll help me?"

"Sure, Neville," Ginny agreed. "Now we just need one more person…" She looked around us to see if anyone around us could work. There were only a few first-years, Nearly Headless Nick floating into the Great Hall, a cat of some other student, Luna Lovegood walking up the steps reading 'the Quibbler' upside down–

Oh, no. Not Looney!

"Hey, Luna!" Ginny yelled over to the looniest girl at Hogwarts. "Could you come over here?"

Luna cocked her head to the side as she looked up. She walked over saying, "Hello, Ginny. Neville,"

"Hello," I said quietly looking at Ginny, giving her a look that clearly said, "Are you mad?!"

Ginny gave me a look right on back that said, "BE. NICE."

Fine, I would, but I didn't have to like it!

"Luna, we need your help with something," Ginny started.

"Oh?" Luna cocked her head to the side again. She gave us that dreamy look of hers.

"Yes. Would you be willing to help us pull a prank on Professor Umbridge?" Ginny looked at her, hopeful.

"Hmm, well I don't have any plans really," Luna gazed off somewhere above us. "Yeah, that sounds like fun,"

"Great," Ginny said, rubbing her hands together. "Now we just need a plan,"

Oh, joy. Here we go…

* * *

It was Friday night and the three of us sat in a deserted classroom together going over the final plan. Dinner would be done in a few minutes and Professor Umbridge would be in her study. Luna would go to her study and tell her that there was a duel in the transfiguration department going wild, which would be real. Ginny provoked Theodore Nott and Zacharias Smith into them fighting each other in a few minutes earlier today. But besides that, Luna would report it to Professor Umbridge right when it started and get her over there. Then, if Professor Umbridge tried to make her way back within the twenty minutes we estimated we would need, Luna would bombard her with many questions and show Umbridge some of her famous radishes and other what-cha-ma-call-its.

Then, watching to make sure the coast was clear, Ginny and I would proceed to Professor Umbridge's office, break in– hoping there was no alarms, of course– and find a woman's personal item that would please Fred and George. We would then make like a tree and leave.

And you're probably thinking, Neville, why don't you guys just break into her office during dinner? Well, if we're not at dinner then that's big evidence saying we had a part in the crime, which we would. So trust me, it won't work. I already suggested it…

"Okay, so everyone clear on the plan?" I asked nervously.

"Neville!" Ginny groaned, complaining. "We've gone over the plan a thousand times! We'll do fine,"

"But what if something happens?" I asked, twisting my hands together from nerves.

"Nothing will happen," Ginny assured me. "We'll do brilliantly!"

"Don't you trust us, Neville?" Luna laughed slightly.

I didn't answer her.

"Okay, the fight should be going on now. Hear the shouting?" Ginny gestured to her right as we headed to Professor Umbridge's and I knew what she meant. Chanting as students egged on the two boys reached our ears. Suddenly, Malfoy appeared in front of us, paid no attention to the fact we were standing right there, and pounded on Professor Umbridge's door. "There's a duel that breaking out in the transfiguration department, Professor!" He shouted unnecessarily.

"What?" Professor Umbridge came sprinting out of her office . " Show me, Draco,"

"Luna, make sure you follow them!" Ginny whispered urgently as the two figures began to recede. Ginny and I watched Luna tail them till they were all out of sight.

"Ready?" I asked, glancing at my partner who I had dragged into this.

Ginny took a deep breath and looked over at me. "Let's do this,"

We swiftly walked to Professor Umbridge's door and Ginny pulled something out of her pocket. I watched as she knelt and slowly began to pick at the lock with a hair grip.

"Why aren't you doing it by magic?" I asked, alarmed. This would take away precious time!

"Priori Incantatem" She told me simply without looking up.

"What?" I asked, baffled.

"If Umbridge notices we took something, which she will, we can't have any spell on our wands to show evidence of us being here. If she checked my wand and I had a charm like Alohomora on it, it would be pretty obvious I had something to do with this, even if I could think of an excuse," She paused. "Which I might be able to pull off with Fred and George, but not the point!"

I watched her in silence, praying to God we could pull this off. Ginny and Luna were pretty smart and Ginny had enough Fred and George experience to know what she was doing. But still… How did I even get here?

"Merlin, I need some pizza," she muttered.

"Pizza? What on earth has this got to do with pizza?" I asked raising my eyebrows.

She looked up at me. "A few slices to put into Fred and George's beds tonight for challenging you to do this, and a few for me; I'm hungry,"

"Whatever makes you happy," I muddled, rocking back and forth on my heels. I looked at my watch. We had elapsed five minutes and Luna had only promised us twenty. We needed to get in there.

"Ginny, are you almost-"

"Done!"

I sighed with relief as the door swung open and an army of pinkness, frilly doilies, and revoltingly cute kittens greeted us. "Holy," I couldn't help but cry out. It was just so… girlie.

"This must be hell," Ginny said, entering behind me. "I really need that pizza now."

"Okay," I said, mentally preparing myself for the unknown. "Let's go,"

Ginny attacked Umbridge's desk while I sprinted to a door to the right. It was hidden from the doorway by an over stuffed bookcase. The door had been left open and I entered to find the decorations the same style as her office only in bedroom form. I searched the room for places for a woman to place her… personal items. A bed furnished with a mahogany frame and lacey pink coverings was in front of me. To the left of said bed, a bookshelf, overflowing with bad romance novels. A mahogany vanity stood to the right of the bed complete with a brilliantly pink stool (also mahogany, funnily enough). And on the wall to my right, there was a mahogany dresser-

A dresser! Perfect!

I sprinted over to the piece of furniture and paused only to look at the pictures on top. There were quite a few silver frames containing photographs of people I could only assume were her family. In one she stood with a younger woman, who looked so much like her, but more pretty and less froggy. I could only assume she was her younger sister. And Professor Umbridge was actually, genuinely… smiling. It was as if she was truly happy and not the fake crap she put on during the day. Was it possible she had a soul?

_Neville, focus. _I quickly got myself into check and yanked open the top drawer. I gagged loudly on my saliva at the sight I saw.

"Neville! You okay?" Ginny yelled from the other room. "We only have 10 minutes left! Did you find anything suspicious?"

"No comment," I croaked out. Ginny was at my side immediately and her eyes bulged at the sight we each saw.

"You see it, too, then?" I asked, glancing at her nervously.

"If you see something very scarring, then yes," I never saw anyone's eyes so wide. "I do,"

"Should I touch it?" She asked suddenly reaching her index finger towards the horrid sight before us.

"No! It looks dangerous!" I squeaked, slapping her hand away.

"Well, Neville, this is about as good as we can get with woman's products," Ginny replied angrily. "So it's either you let me touch it and be the one to hold it, or YOU get to do it,"

I let her be the one to take it.

We sprinted out of the study like hippogriffs and charged down corridors in a non-specific fashion. The plan at this point to was to get away as fast as possible and just get to the Gryffindor Common Room and hand over our loot to Fred and George.

* * *

"Holy," Fred whispered softly as he looked at the garment Ginny held out for him. "You got this from Umbridge's room?!"

"No, Fred," Ginny said, obviously annoyed. "I got it from our mum's,"

Fred looked even more alarmed "You're being sarcastic, right?"

Ginny rolled her eyes. "YES, Fred. If I found that in our mum's dresser, I would literally wipe my memory of that particular memory for good. Or send it to Percy. Either way is a sounds marvelous, don't you agree?"

"Well, Neville," Fred sighed taking the garment gingerly from Ginny. "We didn't believe you could do it,"

"But you proved us wrong," George finished. "Congratulations,"

"Thanks," I sighed with relief still trying to comprehend I had actually done it. Me! Neville Longbottom!

"Well guys, I would love to stay here and chat but…" Ginny trailed off as she got up from her chair. "I'm going to go send word to Luna of the success and go see Michael, so if you would excuse me,"

George watched her leave out of the portrait hole and suddenly the same evil grin I've seen many times before crept upon his face. "You know, she didn't have that bad of an idea with the whole giving it to Percy…"

And that is how Ginny, Luna, and I could never look at Professor Umbridge the same way again, and how Percy Weasley showed up at his job the next morning with a wrapped present at his desk, labeled for him, without a sender's name. He opened it to find nothing other then a frilly pink thong in the box. Size: Extra large.

_**Okay, I'm not totally satisfied but I couldn't take rereading and editing it another time so… review and tell me!? Thanks and hope you liked it!**_

_**~Meg**_


End file.
